Avatar: The Way of Water is visually stunning. It's also a terribly written mess of plot holes, cliches and contrivances. If this is the best cinema has to offer, then what's the point?
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*Timestamps!*
Intro - O Brave New World: 00:00 - 14:15
Recap - Dances With Smurfs: 14:16 - 16:26
Bad Avatard Defences: 16:27 - 23:14
Subscribe to The Movie Cynic: 23:15 - 24:02
Back to Pandora: 24:03 - 31:11
Somehow, Quaritch Returned: 31:12 - 36:07
But Muh Themes: 36:08 - 44:57
A Kidnapping: 44:58 - 50:33
Quaritch & Spider: 50:34 - 59:20
The Sea Smurfs: 59:21 - 01:06:11
Wonderlust: 01:06:12 - 01:11:42
Riding the Fauna: 01:11:43 - 01:14:12
Phase 4 Writing: 01:14:13 - 01:17:03
Teen Drama - 01:17:04 - 01:24:10
Ellen Ripley Has Epilepsy: 01:24:11 - 01:29:16
James Cameron's Writers' Room: 01:29:17 - 01:34:40
Convenient Whaling Ship: 01:34:41 - 01:40:58
Something About Whales: 01:40:59 - 01:43:20
Of Spider: 01:43:21 - 01:50:09
Dances With Whales: 01:50:10 - 02:01:05
Even More Whales: 02:01:06 - 02:06:52
The Soundtrack Sucks: 02:06:53 - 02:10:57
Anti-Ageing Whale Goo: 02:10:58 - 02:17:30
The Smurfs Go to War: 02:17:31 - 02:23:05
All Out War: 02:23:06 - 02:40:00
Somebody Dies: 02:40:01 - 02:46:35
Inane Action: 02:46:36 - 03:04:31
Happily Ever After: 03:04:32 - 03:10:10
Outro - The Feelies: 03:10:11 - 03:26:56