The Gottmans give advice on healthy conflict in marriage & relationships. Drs John & Julie Gottman say conflict doesn’t have to suck. These iconic relationship researchers tell us how. Even though the majority of the Gottmans’ research is on couples, the advice is applicable to all types of relationships. In this episode we talk about:
- The three principle conflict styles
- Why we often don’t understand what it is we’re fighting about
- Perpetual problems vs. Solvable problems
- Why the first three minutes of an argument are key
- The simple sentence to use at the beginning of an argument
- How to downregulate defensiveness in an argument
- Why the Gottmans’ believe there is no such thing as constructive criticism
- Why apologizing quickly isn’t always the right move
- When a fight might spell the end
Fight Right: How Successful Couples Turn Conflict Into Connection is the name of a new book by esteemed guests Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman.
They are the co-Founders of The Gottman Institute and have completed over 40 years of research with more than 3,000 couples. John is the researcher; Julie the clinician. They have written several books together, including Eight Dates and The Love Prescription.
Learn more about Ten Percent Happier podcast at http://www.tenpercent.com/podcast.
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