In this edition of Mormon Stories Podcast, Margi Dehlin turns the tables and asks John all the questions—focusing on what surprised John about his excommunication process, what the best and most difficult parts of running Mormon Stories and The Open Stories Foundation are, what are some regrets he has, what keeps him up at night, what his motivations are behind his parenting and relationships, along with much more!
Margi Interviews John one-on-one Part 1: https://youtu.be/-5E1I4flKUE
Host Margi Dehlin
Guest John Dehlin
Acceptance commitment therapy
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acceptance_and_commitment_therapy
Lloyd Evans interview
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2A1BbW3Et4&ab_channel=MormonStoriesPodcast
Something in the way she moves
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p0FJUVo-BaM&ab_channel=JamesTaylor
Making sense podcast
https://www.samharris.org/podcasts
WTF podcast
http://www.wtfpod.com/
Armchair expert
https://armchairexpertpod.com/
Secular buddhism
https://secularbuddhism.com/
Fresh air
https://www.npr.org/podcasts/381444908/fresh-air
Radio S
https://www.radios.rs/podcast
Last lion alone
https://www.amazon.com/Last-Lion-Winston-Churchill-1932-1940/dp/0385313314
Master of the Senate
https://www.amazon.com/Master-Senate-Years-Lyndon-Johnson/dp/0394720954
No ordinary time
https://www.amazon.com/No-Ordinary-Time-Franklin-Roosevelt-ebook/dp/B002HJV79U
Macolm X autobiography
https://www.amazon.com/Autobiography-Malcolm-Told-Alex-Haley/dp/0345350685
A new earth
https://www.amazon.com/New-Earth-Awakening-Purpose-Selection/dp/0452289963
East of Eden
https://www.amazon.com/New-Earth-Awakening-Purpose-Selection/dp/0452289963
00:00 Introduction
00:30 What was difficult to learn for you personally? Concious wisdom, less reactivity
01:46 What was difficult to learn professionally Impossible to find people who arent't traumatized in some way to work with. Not losing creative impulse, Artistic integrity. Structure where you are the face of the thing. Managing board and staff.
07:54 Creative visions being compromised vs having to let go so it can blossom and grow
09:00 Would you hire staff again? Still massive need!
11:056 Massive need for secular communities. Books, therapists, etc.
13:32 What would a focusing mantra for you be? 'Accept what is.'
14:42 What are a few things we have in common?
16:11 What wakes you up at night? What do you ruminate about? Focusing on things he can influence. The personal attacks that come with being a public figure. Attacks from people that we used to see as friends. Lloyd Evans' experience. Biggest enemies are within the movement
28:46 What soothes you when you're upset? James Taylor song. Food, baths, sleep some of the other things :)
32:02 What do you cherish most about our children? High emotional IQ. Deep wisdom of people. Grateful they have the ability to push back. Resilience, creativity. Willing to step off the path of convenience.
36:03 What does conscious parenting mean to you? Not our job to mold our kids, but see them and love them - giving them a chance to become who they are. We come from a framework of conditional love. Even after leaving you don't see it. Unravelling it is hard.
40:05 Do you regret anything in your life? And how would you want to follow up? Faith crisis several points in his life. There was a good year where I was just lost. From 2012 to now has been a rebuilding of trust. Our kids and our relationship have scars.
45:41 What did that experience bring you that you didn't have before? The heart doesn't start to operate correctly until it's been broken, that people leave you. Marriage struggled within the paradigm of the Church. Both were unfulfilled. Gruelling work, but feeling very fulfilled now.
55:07 Margi feels similarly. But not every marriage should last. Blessing marriages that end so love can live.
58:41 What are some of your favorite podcasts? Sam Harris Making sense, others
1:00:10 Favorite non fiction books
1:03:35 How about fiction?
1:04:15 What music do you love? Beatles! Classic rock. Broadway
1:06:09 What are some movies that made you a better human? Eg Frank Capra movies, Godfather. Marvel. Movies of people who can rise above and make a difference. Humanized heroes and villains
1:09:21 How would you like to be remembered professionally? Hope to be able to find partners to create what's next - a healthy and vibrant path of spirituality
1:15:24 Not just for mormons but also evangelical christians and all other beliefs. Building is much harder though
1:16:40 How would you like to be remembered personally? A formal apology. It's been incredibly moving to be part of so many other people's lives
1:21:53 Thanking all the interviewees and listeners, closing words.