Justin Sunseri explains the concept of dorsal vagal shutdown, a state of immobilization and resource conservation in the face of life threats. He outlines how this shutdown affects emotions, thoughts, behaviors, and connections with others, making it difficult for individuals to function normally. Justin provides insights on recognizing shutdown in loved ones, emphasizing the importance of compassion, validation, and meaningful connection. He offers practical steps for supporting someone in shutdown, including validating their experience, normalizing their response, and connecting with them without adding pressure. The episode concludes with a parenting example illustrating effective ways to help a loved one move out of shutdown.
00:00 Stuck in Shutdown: A Guide to Recognizing and Helping Loved Ones (SNB 248)
01:17 What is Dorsal Vagal Shutdown?
03:14 Shutdown and Isolation
04:54 Demeanor and Body Posture of Shutdown
07:47 Vocal Changes in Shutdown
09:08 Thinking and Shutdown
11:05 Emotions and Shutdown
12:06 Shutdown and Masking
13:07 Validating Your Loved One's Shutdown
14:23 Normalize Your Loved One's Shutdown
15:29 Let your Loved One be in Shutdown
16:37 Connect With Your Loved One in Shutdown
17:55 Example of Parents Helping Their Adult Child in Shutdown
22:29 Outro and Reflections for You
23:32 Learn More About Shutdown With this Playlist
Resources:
🔸 Shutdown Experiences Playlist - https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL0wCusCOxhNUTWUAnJke_hpmNEEQ0atZZ
🔸 Free resources and course in the Members Center - https://www.justinlmft.com/members
🔸 SNB: Total Access Membership - https://www.justinlmft.com/totalaccess
🔸 Polyvagal Intro webpage - https://www.justinlmft.com/polyvagalintro
About the Host: Justin Sunseri is a therapist and coach committed to helping you live with calm, confidence, and connection—no psychobabble, no woo-woo. Justin is the author of the Stuck Not Broken book series, a member of the Polyvagal Institute's Editorial Board, a father of two, and a husband.
Crisis Resources:
- National Suicide Prevention Hotline - 1 (800) 273-8255
- National Domestic Violence Hotline -1 (800) 799-7233
- LGBT Trevor Project Lifeline - 1 (866) 488-7386
- National Sexual Assault Hotline - 1 (800) 656-4673
- Crisis Text Line - Text “HOME” to 741741
- Call 911 for emergency
Disclaimer: This and other content produced by Justin Sunseri (“JustinLMFT”) (i.e; podcast, YouTube, Instagram, etc.) is not therapy, not intended to be therapy or be a replacement for therapy. Nothing in this creates or indicates a therapeutic relationship. Please consult with your therapist or seek for one in your area if you are experiencing mental health symptoms. Nothing should be construed to be specific life advice; it is for educational and entertainment purposes only.
Justin Sunseri is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist registered in the State of California (99147).