Even after spending the last five years submerging myself in psychology, self-help, and personal growth content, some things have been very hard to change. It surprises me that, even after learning so much, I can still feel like I’m still pushing the same old rocks up the same old hills. On today’s episode I’m joined by Dr. Rick Hanson to explore why we struggle to change for the better, how much change is realistically possible, what makes lasting change hard, the hidden barriers to real change, and how we can keep growing.
Key Topics:
0:00 Introduction
3:50 Why do you want to change?
4:45 Four fundamental strategies
6:55 Three common issues
9:20 Effort, skillfulness, and luck
12:55 People’s autonomy about whether they want to change or not
14:15 “Tailwinds” to help yourself
18:00 Secondary gains, avoiding change, and naming payoffs and costs
24:50 Levity and affection for yourself
27:10 Starting by owning that we choose our behavior
30:30 Resistance and the parts of us that don’t want to change
34:35 Framing, starting with benefits, and absolving shame
40:35 Tactics vs. Strategies
43:20 Celebrating small change, aiming for big healing
47:55 Recap
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Who Am I: I'm Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (https://amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (https://apple.co/38ufGG0). I'm making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.
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