Insidious vs. overt family dynamics (Watch Family Dynamics Playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsh_y_ett4o321k6L9U3UjBVISvHscSzE )
Narcissistic families present a facade of either harmony (pseudomutuality) or disharmony (constant bickering, pseudohostility). In both cases, the members of the dysfunctional family are not allowed to separate and individuate and are subjected to a cultlike power asymmetry.
Family homeostasis threatened by honesty (“king is naked”): compliance (conformity) vs. dissent
Collusion in bullying to deflect attention from real problems and to ally with the powerful against the powerless and helpless
Scapegoat role within cultlike settings (Rebecca Mandeville: Family Scapegoating Abuse or FSA)
Bullying, harassment, control, coercion, intimidation (ambient), gaslighting, defamation (smears)
Truth monopolies
Slander and gossip
Shaming and guilt-tripping: Machiavellian control
Invisibility: ignoring, neglect, betrayal blindness, rejection (ostracism)
When you cannot or are not allowed to express your experience of trauma and abuse, breach of trust, negative emotions, and profound betrayal by someone you depend on in any crucial way. Such denial and repression lead to dissociation and a host of long-term mental health disorders.
Repression ethos: no emotions, please (delegitimized affect)
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